How do you handle feedback and criticism as a project manager?

I remember a time when I’d be offended by constructive criticism. Then I learned to see it as a gift. Someone cares enough to tell me a way I can improve. When we set our egos aside and realize it's not personal, we can grow. Knowing their intention is excellent. Dive into what they're saying and why they’re saying it. Being curious to learn and having a growth mindset will help you manage projects better.

In my experience understanding the intent of the feedback goes a long way to set a foundation for processing it in a positive manner. Knowing you have mutual goals with the person providing the feedback should eliminate if not reduce the adversarial aspect. Finally, breathe before you speak and recognize that the person providing feedback is taking their time and effort to help propel you forward to grow. As with all else, if you do not understand the premise of the feedback politely ask. In most scenarios as a project manager you are leading through serving and hopefully that leads to better team chemistry, norming and progress for the team.

I would add that I always assume good intentions. It’s a good place to start from. Then we come from a place of common ground.

If you are sensitive to constructive feedback: -know your triggers and treat yourself with self-compassion when those come up -work on your mindset about feedback (for example, this person wants the best for me; or find the 1% truth if you tend to get defensive) -set yourself up for success (have a grounding/calming ritual when you know you’re getting feedback) -metabolize the feedback on your terms (you might need a walk, some time by yourself, a talk with a friend) - that is completely normal and okay.

Schedule time for feedback. One-on-ones. Retrospectives. You name it. I created a Google Form to collect anonymous feedback, shares it with my direct reports, and had it in my Slack profile. Don't just ask for feedback. Create opportunities for it. The best way to start a feedback session is to ask what's one thing you can work on. The follow-up with the person and ask how you're doing. I highly recommend "What got you here, won't get you there" for more tips.

perspective vs perception. By actively listening, you are hearing their perception and even if you do not agree with it, doesn't make it right or wrong. As a leader, you have to take accountability of what you could have or haven't done differently to change the perspective.

#1 - Item with this topic. Feedback is free data, collect it and then analyze it to better a series of areas from Communication to engagement. Another huge benefit, it can qualify a practice or method which was leveraged during a project.

Actually I disagree with listening actively. It can give a false sense of confidence in the other person that the feedback is sinking in. Instead, take notes during the feedback session. Pen and paper (if face to face) or in a shared document (if video conference). Validate your notes by asking if you got it or if you missed anything. If you get a long list of actionable items, ask what they would like to see you work on first. Then follow up and ask how you're doing. The follow up is crucial. It shows you really care about their feedback. If you don't know how to take action, ask them for recommendations. Be vulnerable. You don't know everything, so why pretend? Come back to the document later and ask what's next.

A VP told me once that you "have to listen with more than your ears!" I took that message to heart and studied human interactions with a view to keeping them constructive. Performance is the topic, not personality.

Hmm. This seems like a form of self preservation. I don't think feedback can be analyzed objectively. It's subjective: Most behaviors will be liked by some and disliked by others. You're a person with feelings (yep, the f word). And you might take the feedback personally at first. It's human. Give yourself time to get back to neutral. The important thing here is to understand that feedback isn't a criticism of your character. Likely, it's a criticism of your behavior, at work. Feedback is given by a person viewing you through their lens - their experience, values, and norms. Try to understand why you're getting the feedback. Ask follow up questions. Is it something you say or do? Learn about how your behaviors need to change.

Rather than respond appropriately, I would say, follow up. Empathize with the person that gave you feedback. Validate it. Help them realize you heard what they said and gave it thought. Talk about something you're going to try or ideas you might have. Ask for their thoughts on the matter. Brainstorm a path forward. Check in with them periodically. Ask if things have improved, gotten worse, or stayed the same. Keep the dialogue going. It's not a single response and you're done. It's an ongoing process. It's iterative.

Caveat: You don't have to implement every piece of feedback you receive. You lose yourself by behaving exactly how other people want you to. Be judicious about what feedback you implement. If you don't agree with the feedback, you can explain why you use your approach. You could have insight that others may not have. Working with folks giving you feedback to understand what's important to them and what isn't, also help you maintain your sanity. Project managers have many people to respond to and it's unfair to walk on egg shells to please everyone. Triage feedback. Use MoSCoW. What's a must have? What's a wish?

There are many resources out there, but your own network may provide more useful, and usable, feedback as these are the people who know you, your work and work circumstances. There are many tools and resources but nothing beats one-on-one feedback.

Yes, this is important. However, reflecting on your experience in a vacuum isn't valuable. That's because you don't work alone. Reflect with others on your experience. Retrospectives are a great tool to reflect on events with a team. One-on-ones is another for intimate reflection. Feedback is a dialogue between you and whomever you work with about how to perform and get on optimally. Ask how you can improve in areas you get critical feedback. Use that information to plan your next steps: books, coaching, etc.

I like this article and I would add two questions: 1. Have you embraced your project manager's accountability for scope, cost and schedule? If you are coming up short here, fix this first. 2. Who is offering the feedback/criticism? Is this person actually in a position to add value? Lots of conversational topics get labeled as feedback without actually offering anything useful.

Two things. 1. This is not just for Project Managers. 2. Project Managers should be actively seeking feedback, regularly. At the Program and PMO levels, the same. Routinely request feedback from your stakeholders and customers.

Actively seek it. The devil’s advocate is your best friend. When in doubt, think about the most critical person you know. Buy them a coffee and test your assumptions.