Lo-0

It's been incredibly long since I've been active on here. Time to whoop my ass into shape. 

It's been incredibly long since I've been active on here. Time to whoop my ass into shape. 

Jordan and I were talking about how in high school we both thought the other was really attractive, but we both had shitty self esteem and thought we weren't good enough for each other. Fuck our lives. haha

So I'm in a sort of three way relationship, but at the same time not really. It sounds strange, I know, but it's what's happening and honestly, I'm not sure how I feel about it. It's not sexual, with me being mostly asexual and the two other people involved being that way for the most part too and so it's almost like a super privileged friendship. Me and the other guy in the relationship have never experimented at all, although we had a crush on each-other for a while and me and the girl have kissed and slept in the same bed, but that's about it. She's the one that decided to pull me into their relationship. I don't know how he feels about it just yet... except that he's okay with it and he enjoys having my presence in the relationship. It's all very strange and foreign to me, but I suppose it might just work out for the better. I don't really feel love in a romantic sense toward either of them, I just like being part of what we have together.

I have been thinking A LOT, specifically about religion. I have been Christian my entire life until I suddenly experienced suppression from the group in which I had always felt comfortable in. I think that I may be theist, rather than Christian. In other words, I believe that there is a God; a very powerful one at that and that he may even be the original Christian God, but, I don't think that he is portrayed correctly. With thousands of years of interpretation under its belt (from human beings nonetheless), I think that the probability of it being tampered with and straying from the original meaning is enormous and therefore I cannot completely trust what the Bible states. I think I will read through it.. in different versions and study it. I want to be able to say that I have read the bible from cover to cover and I know all the contexts, versions and the original Hebrew. I want to be able to interpret it or see it, for what it is, and not what some old man believes what God supposedly told him. I don't know that man. I didn't know King James or even Paul himself, so I have no way of confirming if I trust this person. So I feel as if I must do it myself.