Out of their Element 33

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Aiden

I've been visiting this lab a lot lately - the one that's similar to what I see at school except something's off. This time there's something new, though. At the center of the room is… a birdcage. A giant one, one I could easily fit inside of. That’s weird. It’s just sitting there, open and empty. Something about it feels incredibly ominous. But still, I can’t help but feel curious, and I slowly start stepping towards it.

I stop in my tracks as something hits me on the top of the head. Just a small tickle of a feeling, it didn’t hurt at all. I briefly glance around but don’t figure out what it was. I look back towards the cage and put one foot in front of the other…

There it is again. It hits me in the face this time, right against the temple. “Mrrghh,” I groan, slowly lifting my head up from my arms. I squint at the light from my laptop and wince at a pain in my lower back. I raise my head further, disoriented at the sight of my living room. I notice a wide array of tiny paper balls near me, the size of BB gun pellets, all over the floor and the ottoman I'm slouched over.

My eyes gravitate towards the desk, and Evie is standing near the edge, looking very out of breath. "Sorry!" she calls out, "You fell asleep and couldn't hear me yelling from here."

Oh, that's what I felt hit me. A wad of paper. I rub my eyes and sit up straighter, slowly coming back to the world. "Thanks for waking me up," I finally respond groggily, "I'm impressed you could throw that far…"

"It was not my first attempt," she says with a breathless laugh, "Sorry, I kinda made a mess."

"No worries."

I start sweeping up the dozens of bits of paper into my hands, surprised at the sheer number of them. I feel touched by the effort. How long had she been trying to wake me?

"You could have used the timer, you know,” I tell her, “That would've been way easier for you."

"Oh." She looks behind her at the visual timer on the back end of the desk that I gave her on day one in case she ever needed to get my attention from a different room. She’s never once used it. "I didn't think about that. In my mind that's just for emergencies… Plus it doesn't sound like a pleasant thing to wake up to."

Well, having the cutest, tiniest girl in the world working so hard to get my attention is certainly not the worst thing to wake up to. Especially when I've been so starved for her attention myself.

Staying low to the ground as I pick up stray paper, I crawl my way towards the trash can that's right next to the desk. Once I've dumped my handful in, I straighten up to a kneeled position, so that Evie's right at my eye level, and for a second I don't even process what she says to me next, I'm too entranced by the sight of her.

Will I ever truly get used to this? She looks like some kind of animated figurine, like she shouldn't be able to move and it's a miracle that she does. As much as I was complimenting her about the amount of detail she was able to paint on the minis, that pales in comparison to the intricate detail that I'm looking at right now. That beautiful little face, her brown eyes shining with life, her tiny mouth shifting so fluidly to form words…

“Huh?” I say, shaking my head as I try to focus on her voice instead.

“See, that’s what I mean,” she says fretfully, “Are you sure you shouldn’t just call it and go to bed?”

“Oh… I’m okay. Tomorrow’s exam isn’t until afternoon. I actually feel pretty ready for it, so I’ll sleep in a little bit. This paper’s due today though, by midnight…” I try again to rub the sleep out of my eyes, pretending that the breath I’m taking is an invigorating one. “I’m getting there. The big thing now is just listing all the sources and stuff at the end.”

Evie tilts her head, concern still painted all over her face. “Is it bad for me to ask you to bring me over there? I don’t want to get in your way, but… it would be easier to help wake you up again if I was closer.”

Between her tone and her posture, she's so self effacing in this moment that I feel a pang of guilt. I don't mean to make her feel like she can't talk to me because I'm so busy… even though that's frustratingly close to the truth. Not that I don't want to spend time with her. God no. This is just a brief amount of time where I have to put everything on pause. Even something as wonderful as whatever has been developing between the two of us. I'm well aware of just how distracting she can be, through no fault of her own.

I hate knowing that she must be having such a hard time these days, though. It was really bad timing that both Moira and I were so busy at the same time. And despite my best efforts, from some of the details that I've noticed, like the open packet of crackers and the charging cord I found on the floor, I'm sure I'm neglecting her even more than I realize. Since she hasn't been advocating for herself, I have no idea the extent to which it's a problem. With all the stress and sleep deprivation on my plate - I think I've gotten less than ten hours of sleep in the entire past three days - I can't even think straight half the time.

I keep telling myself it'll all get better by the end of this week. But right now I can't help reaching out, quite literally. I place a hand right behind her, ready to pluck her up.

"Okay, yeah. Sure. Will you be okay with just your phone for entertainment?"

Evie says yes, so I take her in one hand and her phone in the other. She wraps her arms around my fingers as I pinch the sides of her torso from behind, and then I carefully shuffle back over to the ottoman while still on my knees.

Whenever I carry her like this, with nothing to support her legs, I've noticed that she tends to kick her feet a little once I lower her down again, in anticipation of reaching the floor. This time is no different - there she goes, bicycling her legs as I bring her closer and closer to the ottoman. I'm so entertained by it in the moment that I sort of… stop. Let her hover there as she continues to kick the air. After a couple of seconds she curiously looks up, takes in my amused expression, and then lets her legs dangle limply as she gives me a look.

"What, did you fall asleep again with your eyes open?" she quips.

"Sorry. You’re just too cute when you do that,” I say with a grin as I finally relent and put her down.

I notice her face goes a shade pinker as she turns to look away from me. I guess I'm not usually so vocal about how adorable I think she is. But I'm too deliriously tired to care.

I've set up her phone close enough to me that, once I go back to working on my laptop, she occasionally makes gentle contact with my arm. In moments of stillness she'll lean her back against me, or reach behind her to stroke my skin with her hand. Presumably it's just to help keep me awake, but I appreciate the caring touches all the same.

It really is helping me to stay alert. At this rate I should be done within the next hour or two. I'm so close to the end I can taste it… Hydrology paper due tonight… Geodata exam tomorrow afternoon… Biochem exam the next day… and then I'm done. I have work the entire following day but at least that’ll be Friday and I’ll have nothing I need to get done over the weekend…

We do run into one moment where I start nodding off again. I don’t even crumble towards the ottoman this time, my head’s apparently just hanging from my neck and the next thing I know, I'm jolted to consciousness by Evie who’s climbed up onto the laptop so that she can yank on my fingertips as she calls my name.

“Okay, good,” she says with a relieved smile as I come to, “I was going to start pulling arm hairs next. I guess you are a light sleeper after all.”

I return the smile and then rub at my face with a groan. “Thank you,” I say, “I’m so close to being done with this… but let me know if you want to get to bed, I don’t want to keep you up.”

My tiny friend hops back off the laptop and gives me a determined nod. “I’m staying right here.”

I hook my index finger around her head so I can rub the back of it appreciatively. I’m being particularly careful about touching her, seeing as I’m so out of it. But thankfully my hands are very accustomed to her presence, even if they’re a little out of practice during all of this studying hell.

“Thanks. This is helpful,” I tell her softly. “Would it be okay if we did this again tomorrow night? It’s Biochem so I’d love it if you could help quiz me.”

“Sure!” Evie says, and to my delight she's fully leaning into my touch on her head, like a bird requesting scritches. “I can be your study buddy, one last time.”

That’s right… The only class we were ever in together is coming to a close. I didn’t really know her at all when she was still able to go to school, just admired her from afar. I wonder what would have happened if I’d said hi to her back then. Would everything else have played out the same? Could I have somehow helped her avoid this shrunken fate? But would it mean we’d be nowhere near as close as we are now?

"Last time for this class at least," I confirm, "but who knows what the future holds!"

I want to keep chatting. This is part of why I’ve kinda been avoiding her during this critical time. I just never want to stop hanging out.

I yawn and wipe away the tired tears that are stinging in my eyes. I remember that I’d brought over my reading glasses, and I reach behind the laptop to where I’d left them so that I can slip them onto my face. My vision’s not bad enough that I regularly need corrective lenses, but when I’m this tired they do help a little.

“I’ve never noticed you wearing glasses before,” Evie says, taking a couple of steps back to get a better view of me.

“Yeah, these help with the eye strain. I guess I’ve been doing it more at night, in my room.”

“They look really good on you.”

I hope I’m imagining the speed at which blood rushes to my cheeks. “Why, thank you,” I say with a stuffy tone as I readjust my glasses with an over-exaggerated nerdiness. We both chuckle.

Come on, Aiden, I tell myself. Focus.

Another solid hour or so passes in forced silence. My increasingly clear approach to the finish line spurs me on, and I stay alert and determined the entire rest of the time. My small helper continues to prod me from time to time just to be sure, and every once in a while it's in a way that gives me goosebumps. But I keep pushing forward. And then, about half an hour before midnight, I finally have uploaded my paper and can hit the “Submit” button.

I feel a massive weight lift off of me, and with amazing timing Evie has pulled music up on her phone, ringing out in a victorious fanfare as she celebrates right alongside me. I get caught in a fit of laughter from the way she runs and jumps around excitedly, and I almost feel inebriated right now, overcome with the relief of finishing one more class.

The music slows down, transitioning into a more whimsical, gently lilting melody. And yet as the tiny woman before me slows her own movements, breathing hard as she looks up at me with glee, my heartbeat jumps up a time signature instead. In a moment that surprises us both, I softly touch my finger to her shoulder and run it down along her arm until I reach her hand. It's so tiny and delicate, her dainty fingers the length of strawberry seeds, and it's just the slightest sensation on the pad of my much larger finger. Ever so cautiously, I lay my thumb on top, her hand disappearing in my grasp, though I can still feel it gripping me back.

I gently pull Evie forward, her first stumbling steps becoming more measured as she follows my lead. The music continues to weave its harmonies into the air and I follow the tempo, raising her arm above her head and carefully spinning it, making her twirl. Her giggle is even more melodic than the music is as we awkwardly find a way to dance.

Since the ottoman’s surface is soft, despite her staying light on her feet she almost falls over multiple times, and I either catch her or dip her backwards or she lands on her knees and poses as if she meant to do that. We’re both laughing the entire time. After a minute or so the music crescendos again into a less easygoing beat and we break apart as we try to catch our breath. All in all, it’s just a moment of silliness. But with the slightest touch of something more.

The last dozen days have been a challenge, for sure. And yet, seeing the effortless synergy that we’re still able to find… It makes me feel like we can get through anything together.

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