alawak

I remember how it felt when I first laid in your bed. There were nervous smiles left behind confident structures, and I drew a blank mind for the first time in a while. There was much to be unsure of and more to be curious about. I remember the first time you put your arm around me. We were covered in blankets and our eyes were fixed on a laptop screen. A movie of our least interest played inaudibly in the background and meshed peacefully with our thoughts. I remember the first time you tried to kiss me. There was something so indigenous about your motions and it shook me. I was insecure with the idea of letting myself go, but you made it ...

I like you because you always want people to be happy and you will go out of your way to do that. And you do this without wanting anything in return.  Sometimes I want to do things in return for you, like give you cigarettes or something, but you won't let me. And you're very stubborn like I am. You do these things selflessly. It makes me happy because it makes me have more hope for people in the world. It helps me water down my cynical outlook. And despite how stubborn you are, you never enforce your opinions on me. And I love that you will let me believe in what I want and watch me be my own person. You don't like talking about yourself ...

There was once a time When an awful nothing Was present in my eyes And along my neckI cried and laughed Until it crawled off And found its home In a dark place in my mindI never spoke a word Or thought a thought Worth living for And I danced it elsewhereThere was once a time When that awful nothing Left my presence and Decided to never come backI cried and laughed Until the absence was poured Out of my soul and into A separate place in my consciousnessI never spoke a word But I thought those thoughts Worth living for And I sulked my time to ashesThere was once a time When that awful nothing Came creeping back into My eyes and made itself a...