Gender, identity, self-harm in emotional middle school tale.
Parents Need to Know
Why Age 9+?
Any Positive Content?
Sex, Romance & Nudity
a little
Shai's mom was once a scared, pregnant college student who faced judgment and scorn from her once-supportive community. Shai and a girl hold hands and are confused about whether they're attracted to each other and how to deal with it.
Did you know you can flag iffy content? Adjust limits for Sex, Romance & Nudity in your kid's entertainment guide.
Shai's mom is hardworking and resourceful, teaching herself new skills and landing a better job when she loses her job in the pandemic—but that takes a lot of her time and attention. Shai is smart, stressed, and trying to figure out a lot of issues. Their school friends—one lesbian, one the surrogate-born child of a gay couple—are a bit one-note but also supportive. The Martels, the French Canadian–Indigenous family Shai and their mom live with, are good friends and work things out when they're not right. The Sterns, Shai's grandparents, are kind and supportive, use Shai's pronouns correctly, and nurture Shai's interest in Judaism.
Diverse Representations
a lot
Shai's family is Jewish; their mom is not observant, but their grandparents are. Shai's mom's friend Thierry and his sons, Thomas and Mille (Emile), are French Canadian with Indigenous roots, and the boys spend each summer in Canada at an Indigenous summer camp. Several characters are gay, bi, or nonbinary. One of Shai's school friends is Asian and has two dads. The characters live in Wisconsin, and there's some poking fun at the determination of Midwesterners to be nice.
Strong messages of acceptance, tolerance, family, friendship, and being there for your loved ones even when things are difficult. Also that it's good to be resourceful and self-reliant, but also good to know when you need help, and who to ask for it.
Educational Value
some
Homeschooled Shai's approach to any problem is to research the living daylights out of it, and the reader is right there with them, whether the subject is queer history, Jewish culture, Hebrew words, the difference between gender and sexuality, styles and formats of poetry, etc. Some French conversation among French Canadian characters. Much discussion of the differences between homeschool and public school. The aftereffects of the pandemic loom large in people's lives.
Parents Need to Know
Parents need to know that Just Shy of Ordinary is a deep dive by A.J. Sass (Ellen Outside the Lines), in verse, texts, and narrative, into the head of anxious 13-year-old Shai Stern, who's dealing with being nonbinary, living with their mom's friend's family because her mom lost her job, misunderstandings with their best friend, never feeling good enough—and also a ferocious skin-picking issue they hide from everyone. Not to mention rediscovering their Jewish heritage. A ferociously bright, determined kid who's been homeschooled for years, Shai does a lot of research and decides to fix the issue by going to regular middle school—where research and real life soon collide. Two female-appearing characters hold hands and have confused but strong romantic feelings for each other. A boy comes out as gay. In the past, a character was shunned by her community for being a single mom. Strong themes of gender identity, Jewish identity, acceptance, family, friendship, and knowing when to ask for help.
There aren't any parent reviews yet. Be the first to review this title.
What's the Story?
In JUST SHY OF ORDINARY, 13-year-old Shai Stern has a lot on their plate. They're nonbinary, and not sure who to tell about it outside the family. Shai's mom, who used to homeschool them, lost her job in the pandemic, moved them in with the family of her longtime friend Thierry, and is now always busy trying to learn skills and find work. Shai is an anxious kid to begin with, and all this stress leads to nonstop skin-picking on their arms, which they've been concealing from everyone. Shai researches and strategizes their way out of any problem, so after turning to the internet for advice on how to fix all this, they come up with an elaborate master plan to create a new normal—starting with going to public school for the first time ever. As so often happens, things don't quite go according to plan, and there are surprises, starting with being placed in 9th grade.
Gender identity, Jewish culture, life changes, self-harm, and middle school are a lot for an anxious 13-year-old to deal with in A.J. Sass's tale of a nonbinary Wisconsin teen seeking a new normal. Just Shy of Ordinary may sometimes leave the reader as overwhelmed, info-overloaded, and confused as the narrator, but there are a lot of relatable moments along the way, too. Shai discovers they can't research their way out of every situation—and that other people are often more capable than you give them credit for.
Talk to Your Kids About ...
Families can talk about gender identity and how it's a theme in storytelling. How does Just Shy of Normal compare with other stories you know that also deal with the subject and how identity affects people's lives?
Would you rather do homeschool or go to regular school? Why?
Shai is very, very good at finding information on any subject—but also one to make important life decisions based on a blog post. Do you think this is a good idea? Why, or why not?
Communicating feelings and asking for help are important themes in this story. Why is it hard sometimes to communicate what's going on or to ask for help? What can make it easier?
Available on:
Audiobook (unabridged), Hardback, iBooks, Kindle
Last updated:
March 12, 2024
Did we miss something on diversity?
Research shows a connection between kids' healthy self-esteem and positive portrayals in media. That's why we've added a new "Diverse Representations" section to our reviews that will be rolling out on an ongoing basis. You can help us help kids by
suggesting a diversity update.
Common Sense Media's unbiased ratings are created by expert reviewers and aren't influenced by the product's creators or by any of our funders, affiliates, or partners.
By Mary Eisenhart
,
based on child development research. How do we rate?
