Frustrated exes go viral on TikTok in revealing new revenge trend: ‘My way of making him pay’
TikTokkers are exposing their exes.
Millions of people are sharing and commenting on a string of videos of users playing back old voice messages that shed light on the inner workings of past traumatic relationships.
The content of the messages vary, with captions like “I heard we’re lip synching our exes voice memos,” but the viral trend has tended to target allegedly abusive former partners.
“These videos go viral because they are so relatable, unfiltered, and vulnerable. Breakups are universal experiences,” Dr. Jenny Woo, founder/CEO of Mind Brain Emotion and creator of 52 Essential Relationship Skills, told The Post.
“This stamp of validation that ‘I’ve been there too’ creates a sense of community and collective processing of failed relationships,” Dr. Woo explained.
While some viewers claim the videos amount to cyberbullying, the overwhelming majority of the comments are from people sending their support to those who came clean with the dirty details, even sharing about similar situations they had been in.
In one TikTok video that has 4.4 million views, @_itsqueenxo casually places pimple patches on her face as an audio clip of her sobbing ex plays.
She then posted several follow-up videos with voice messages of her ex threatening her and going on aggressive profanity-filled rants. She went on to divulge details of what she claimed happened during their three-year abusive relationship.
The young woman’s moves and nonchalant attitude in the video paired with her ex’s aggression seem to be quietly mocking the dramatic meltdown.
The 23-year-old, who goes by Queen, explained to The Post that she posted the video to earn money through the TikTok creator fund, in order to pay for the repair of the front tooth her ex-boyfriend broke when he physically abused her.
“After him going months without fixing my tooth that he broke after saying he would I just figured I would take it into my own hands and using his [voicemails] kinda helped me feel like it’s my way of making him pay for the wrong he did,” she said.
The young woman also said that most of the people who have replied to her TikTok videos have shared that they’ve been through similar situations, but “others think that I’m completely wrong no matter what he did to me.”
Queen said that her ex has reached out to her to talk and “find peace” since the videos went viral —but doesn’t think that people have figured out his identity from her videos. She refuses to see him.
“By posting the voice notes you’re opening up what was once a private message to a larger, public audience, where you can get validation from anyone and everyone after they, too, hear your ex’s voice note,” Francesca Maximé, a New York licensed clinical social worker and life coach, told The Post.
“In this way, you might feel supported in your decision to leave, or not sorry they did break up with you, because other people can see how ridiculous your ex was being, and your duplicating their message, often in a mocking way, on TikTok, is a way you might be able to feel good about the fact that they’re your ex.”
In a video that has accumulated 2.2 million views, @lanihope15 lip-syncs along to an audio clip — allegedly of her ex berating her.
“I swear to f-cking God you’re finning a make me block you, you dumba– little girl. Shut the f-ck up. I’m not embarrassed to post you. I’m finna leave you. Shut the f-ck up talking dumb sh-t,” an unknown man said in the clip.
The user told The Post that she enjoyed “mocking him” — saying that she “posted the video because it was funny…funny and entertaining.”
“Lip-syncing to exes’ voicemails and sharing it publicly can be a form of emotional release — and, in some cases, emotional revenge,” Dr. Woo said.
“This act of turning pain into performance can be incredibly cathartic and healing.”